Hello all! Sorry it’s been so long since my last post. It’s been a combination of laziness and depression. I have had a more active posting life on Twitter recently. I am just in a funk with life right now. Not much excitement with me at the present. Been playing some video games, watching movies, the normal routine. Work has been a little more soul sucking that normal. We had some layoffs and there is a lot of tension in the air. Hopefully things will settle down soon.
Sorry for the short post. I’m just getting myself back in the game. There will be more to come!
Hello all. Hope everyone is doing well and had a nice long holiday weekend. I know I’m a few days late posting, but honestly not much is happening. I am still floundering when it comes to the direction of this blog. I’ve honestly been more active on Twitter as of late. I gave definitely gone more political on Twitter. I think it’s good to have voices out there coming together as one to fight all of the bad in the world. Discussion is the seed in which action grows. I hope to meet some more interesting people, learn more about people I didn’t know before and just keep a positive vibe on everything. So this is all tonight. If you would like, follow me on Twitter @MLCTaskforce. Take care and I promise more material soon.
Good evening all! It has been a bit since I have posted, but I have been out of town and just got back late last night. As the title says, it was for a wedding that my wife and I took off to Wisconsin. This was our great grand niece on my wife’s side getting married to her true love. This is the first time in a very long time that I have actually seen two people truly in love. The wedding was outside on the most perfect summer afternoon I have ever seen. There were flowers everywhere and you could catch their scent whenever the wind shifted. The bride was beautiful. The groom actually cried as she came down the aisle. They both were so filled with joy and I hope for all the happiness in the world for them for their future. The whole weekend got me to thinking about lots of things. I was in a bit of a reflective mood. I think about these two kids, just starting out and the whole world is theirs for the taking. I have to admit I am envious of it. I mean who hasn’t wanted a do-over every now and then. I am talking about little and big decisions. What if I had finished college? What if I had kissed that one special young woman back in the past? What if I took more chances? I know I have twisted this from a beautiful love story into a selfish reflection about me. I think when you see the future in those young lovers, you can’t help but place yourself there. To travel back in time in your mind and rewrite history, ever so subtlety or maybe even do a total rewrite with a new script and new players. I saw these kids at the wedding reception, so full of happiness and love. They were dancing and acting crazy with their friends and just living in that moment. They are young and they know the world is theirs. I wanted to feed on that energy, that hope, that wreck less abandon they felt. Alas, time has made me more cynical and cold than any person should ever be. I think that is why part of the reason I started this blog, to explore and to find that person of my youth. Laughing and singing and just waiting for the next moment. I can emote better here than I can in person. Over the years, I have trained myself to hold back, to cut myself off from people in my life. Part of it is the nature of how I grew up, but I can’t blame it strictly on that. It is a conditioning I have embraced. Various things from my past, that are my fault, have made me build this wall. I a trying to tear it down, but it is hard to do. Seeing two people in love, which such a promising future exposed the fractures in my façade. I truly wish them every bit of happiness the world has to give, but there is a little tint of green in these words.
Have a great evening!
In the frozen minutes between twilight and dawn,
I lay in my bed wondering what went wrong
Between the life I wanted and the life I live.
Wishing I could go back and rewrite my narrative,
But in the end, our script is etched in stone
No going back, no changing what was.
I’m here at work today and as usual my mind and heart are not into it. My cubicle feels like it’s closing in on me. I’m not using the word prison just because there are people in cages now and I know what I’m going through is nothing compared to that. I’m in a sludge of a job. It pays well, so I can’t complain about that. The work swings from mind numbingly boring to banging your head against the wall frustrating. Lately I’ve had this feeling of running away. Dropping it all and starting over. I guess a lot of people my age feel that way. I have no intention of doing it, but the thought pops in my head occasionally.
I’ve noticed that older I get, the less tolerant I am towards the status quo. I’m not becoming more conservative as I get older, but more radical. Well these days radical means you believe in healthcare for all, women’s rights, fair and just treatment of immigrants, free college and basically anything a civilized society can agree upon. In today’s America, that’s radical.
Anyway, this was just a few thoughts floating around my head. I’m trying to be better about posting.
Well it looks like Trump has put his foot firmly in the middle of the mud and slime that is racism. I just keep getting amazed at the shit he says and is allowed to say by his own party. I do need to clarify, I know the Republican Party is full of racist assholes. This goes for the herd that follows Trump to the Republican Leadership. What I mean is there is no word as of yet from Republicans in response to racist rant he had on Twitter Sunday night. The silence says so much at this point. This meathead cannot just go out and say he represents this country. Yes there are racists that are his base. It is those and the Hillary haters that got this idiot elected in the first place. The anger these Republicans must feel towards minorities has to be overwhelming. Their insecurity that the country might not be as white as it once was is sickening. I just hope we can get this fool out of office at the next election.
Good evening everyone. I hope everyone had a great weekend and a relaxing Sunday night. I’m just chilling and watching a little YouTube. This weekend was pretty relaxing. Saturday bummed around and played video games. (Review coming shortly). Today went and saw Spiderman: Far from Home. I will say if you can get past the first 40 minutes, the movie definitely picks up. Jake Gyllenhaal was excellent as Mysterio. I won’t go into much, the movie hasn’t been out that long and I don’t want to spoil it.
So with Sunday Evening comes anxiety. I hate Sunday nights. I dread going to work. I know we all do, but it’s just getting worse the older I get. The thought of 25 more years of this is too depressing for words. I’ll put on my big boy pants tonight and get over it. Just was on my mind. Needed to get it out.
Well that’s all I have tonight. Not much to say. I’m trying to be better at posting. Hopefully you will be seeing more content!