OK, Hollywood. I know you have a silly Dracula movie coming out. I know it’s supposed to be young and hip. I know it’s a probable reboot to the entire classic monster franchise of movies.
But you have bludgeoned me nearly to death with your blitzkrieg of an add campaign. It’s like listening to an incessant three-year-old clamouring for attention. And now that it has bombarded my senses for the umteenth time, I will never watch this movie. Ever. Even on streaming. Even drunk. Even if it is a gift. Even if it’s selected as a Bad Movie Review. There might have been a 0.02% chance of my seeing it originally, but even that’s gone now.
Fuck you very much, Hollywood. I hope your movie tanks harder than Movie 43!
Rando!
Mid-Life Crisis Task Force 